…the almost right word

i wake up. i make my coffee and sip water. i sit down at the computer and open firefox to the new york times, and then indymedia. i think that i should see what’s happening outside my little santa fe bubble. but when i do, it makes me so thoroughly disappointed that i just want to hide in facebook or other blogs.

a series of wonderfully depressing headlines:

• Indymedia Journalists Targeted in Ecuador, Five Arrested

• Anti-Immigrant Attacks in South Africa

• 158 Relief Workers in China Are Killed by Landslides

• 2 Weeks After Cyclone, Burmese Leader Pays First Visit to Refugees

how are we supposed to respond to this?
i feel like burying my head in the sand and never reading the news again.
and she once wanted to write for the new york times, folks.

seen this yet? it’ll need to be refreshed a few times…

don julio reposado
i discovered this to be the smoothest tequila ever. expensive, yes. but oh so good.

sometimes we’ll be laying by the docks so undisturbed.
folding, maybe, leaves on the ground turned brown with age.
that’s the part of you that stays.
that’s the part i hope remains.

–pinback

this could be me:

what do you think of the new layout (i’m still tweaking)?
let me know.

“inclusive” is not the word that i think of, when i think of santa fe, nm. in fact, santa fe is one of the most separated, segregated communities i have seen. all the white richies live in the downtown area, or the vast adobe homes spanning across the desert. meanwhile, you have to travel down the worst street in town (constant construction, constant traffic) to find any diversity. and don’t forget that diversity, here, means latinos (remember them? they’re the ones who cook our food at that fancy restaurant and refill our pelligrino) — seeing an african american in santa fe is like seeing a house that doesn’t have an adobe facade — it’s unheard of, trust me.

Breaking News 1:08 PM ET:
California Supreme Court Overturns Gay Marriage Ban

– ny times

there is hope for you yet, california!

have you seen this? it’ll make you laugh for hours.
(warning: ignore typical rules for grammar, spelling, and punctuation)

i’m stuck in the tardis
trapped in hyperspace
one minute snake charming
the next in another place

all the right moves and
earn the right percent
watch me dance like a puppet
you can almost see the strings

give me an answer
give me a sign
i’ve been climbing up this ladder
i’ve been wasting my time

so long, so long
so long, so long

up on the ladder
no time to escape
up on the ladder
away for fucking sake

up on the ladder
try to call out your name
up on the ladder
you’re all the fucking same

oh, you let the people down
you let the people down
you let the people down

– radiohead

robert rauschenberg, october 22, 1925 — may 12, 2008
painter, sculptor, combine-maker, abstract expressionist, trash-collector, collage and found object-er, silkscreener…
a quote: i think a painting is more like the real world if it’s made out of the real world.
i was introduced to rauschenberg many years ago, by my mother. i have followed his work, in one way or another, since. he was a great creator. the nytimes writer: “a brash, garrulous, hard-drinking, open-faced southerner, he had a charm and peculiar delphic felicity with language that masked a complex personality and an equally multilayered emotional approach to art, which evolved as his stature did.” damn, what a sentence.

(and she’s back with a vengeance, ladies and gentlemen)

pumpkin ravioli
if you ever have the great opportunity to find this on a menu, try it. it may well be the best thing your mouth has ever tasted. on a recent trip to california, we sampled this very dish at mi piace — quite possibly the best recipe ever.

granola, plain yogurt & fruit
a great breakfast, a great combination. a.r.w. specifically recommends super nutty granola, which can be found at whole foods, and trader joe’s plain yogurt. add strawberries or blackberries or blueberries, or whatever. it’s quite wonderful.

remember when we all used c.d. players?! and eventually we all had 5 disc c.d. changers?? we’d leave five discs in there and listen to them on repeat for days, months. well, if i used my 5 disc c.d. changer (because yes, i do still have one), these would be the discs on rotation:

1. radiohead, in rainbows (discs one and two)
i didn’t even know there was a second disk until recently and damn! both of these albums would not even leave my 5 disc c.d. changer. top tracks? all i need, jigsaw falling into place, videotape, mk1, up on the ladder.

get yourself together
let the light pour in
pour yourself a hot bath, pour yourself a drink

2. tegan and sara, the con
yes, we all know the a.r.w. is a bit infatuated with this duo of canadian sisters. aside from the con, we also recommend so jealous and if it was you. first discovered tegan and sara with the l word, then they were played incessantly on the first season of grey’s anatomy. now they are played incessantly in the a.r.w.’s car and headphones. best tracks off the con? — dark come soon, the con, knife going in, call it off.

3. rilo kiley, under the blacklight
close call is, perhaps, one of the a.r.w.’s favorite songs of the year. rolling stone said, “always too cute for serious indie cred, jenny lewis slips four songs about dangerous sex in which she herself might be indulging — right now, in her pretty prosperity — into music that’s defined rather than just decorated by its stylistic flirtations….here a soul horn section, there a fleetwood mac homage, there a synth outro and almost nowhere much guitar-band alt-rock.” need i say more? the moneymaker, under the black light, and dejalo — definitely worth a listen.

4. santogold, santogold
another grey’s anatomy discovery, believe it or not. in fact, every time i listen to the best track on this album, creator, i think of meredith grey and christina yang dancing and drinking tequila. does it get any better than that? yes, santogold, real name: santi white, reminds me of m.i.a. but she’s got her own style, her own beats, and a kick-ass track to boot. creator rocks, over and over and over again.

5. portishead, third
after a decade-long absence, portishead is back and it was worth the wait. i’ll let rolling stone say it for me: “it’s been ten years since the world last heard from portishead, the u.k. trip-hop trio, and they do not sound like they’ve spent the past decade going to therapy, listening to new music or making friends. actually, they sound like they spent it locked in a tea cupboard underwater off the coast of bristol, with a piped-in orchestral soundtrack from dario argento horror movies. is this a problem?”

it’s been two days since i last posted and already i feel a guilt seeping into my blood stream. i despise bloggers who do not post regularly (no offense to any readers of this blog). yet here i am, avoiding.

a quote from a friend:
your absence is a gaping, gangrenous wound. it oozes with the puss of longing.

“children can be harsh judges when it comes to their parents, disinclined to grant clemency, and this was especially true in chris’s case. more even than most teens, he tended to see things in black and white. he measured himself and those around him by an impossibly rigorous moral code…

…the boy could not pardon the mistakes his father had made as a young man, and he was even less willing to pardon the attempt at concealment.”

‘into the wild’
– jon krakauer

“you could tell right away that alex was intelligent,” westerberg reflects, draining his third drink. “he read a lot. used a lot of big words. i think maybe part of what got him into trouble was that he did too much thinking. sometimes he tried too hard to make sense of the world, to figure out why people were bad to each other so often. a couple of times i tried to tell him it was a mistake to get too deep into that kind of stuff, but alex got stuck on things. he always had to know the absolute right answer before he could go on to the next thing.”

–jon krakauer

i put on my headphones and turn up the radiohead…again.

i am an animal, trapped in your hot car.

when i’m done eating my quesadilla, i will go outside and sit in the sun. and read. and attempt to quell my mind.

okay, i too have an opinion on the hills. of course i do! first of all, let me admit that i have seen many episodes, if not most of them. they are, for the most part, entertaining in a kind of mindless, let-me-laugh-at-you-not-with-you sorta way. and yes, i grew up in the l.a. area and thus find places and things familiar, etc.

but please. this show is too much. and the cover of rolling stone is even more too much! i am seriously beginning to despise these girls, especially heidi (the one pictured on the left with the most ridiculous look on her face, and the most ridiculous outfit. i do realize that they all have a ridiculous look on their faces, and ridiculous outfits, but hers is, by far, the most ridiculous). and then, to read the article! my gods! (that’s a battlestar galactica reference, f.y.i.)

heidi and her boyfriend were interviewed for the article. the idiot boyfriend states that he’d like to be mayor and then governor…eventually hinting that yes, presidency is in his sights too.

if this guy gains any political clout, i will, without a doubt, move to a foreign country. that’s a promise. and i am well aware that many share my opinion, it’s nothing original. but it’s certainly valid.